A Coaching Model Created by Patrycja Sałacińska-Kone
(Transformational Coach, SPAIN)
I. Introduction
The presented ARINOAH Coaching model is a very particular one, as it is directly connected with a broader project that I am developing, called “The Arinoah Garden”.
“The Arinoah Garden” Project
To sum up, I am creating a place, where all the people with whom I have been and will be connected (personally, spiritually, mentally, and in many other ways, including my coachees) since my very early childhood, through my whole life journey, until now and looking forward, will be welcome – at any moment when they need to connect with themselves, with nature, heal from some suffering or create something.
This place is called “The Arinoah Garden” (from the names of my children – Ariana and Noah) and it is a very special piece of land (that I have found already – you can see the actual entrance to it on the cover page of this document) at the Spanish Mediterranean coast.
I aspire to offer all those beautiful people that have touched or will touch my life anyhow a place where they can experience themselves that there is a profound truth in one of my favorites quotes:
Heaven is not a place where we go when we die. It is a state of mind. (Michael Bernard Beckwith)
This “magic” will happen thanks to the place itself, the energy and hospitality offered to the guests (and by them), the community of people that are already emerging around this project, and last, but not least, thanks to my coaching skills (and also other professional skills offered by other people that will get involved in the project and will want to contribute to it by supporting people with their coaching, therapeutic or other skills). Additionally, an important part of the healing process might happen thanks to the guests’ contribution itself – i.e., thanks to the energy (both received and given) and any kind of work or service of all the people that have already been involved and will be involved in this place[1].
II. The ARINOAH Coaching model
I aspire to connect “The Arinoah Garden” project with my coaching practice. Hearing from my coachees that they do experience an important progress/relief/lightness/change/empowerment or even some new sense of happiness after our sessions, my dream is to offer them a deeper experience, inviting them to the Arinoah Garden for a few days, so they can dive deeper into themselves, go through more profound coaching and healing, and in the same time have a beautiful moment to connect with themselves in a beautiful setting of the Spanish coast.
“Coincidently” (though I believe that everything happens for a reason J) the name of this place can beautifully stand for an acronym of the coaching model that on one hand presents the process I am already going through with my coachees, and on the other hand can be applied to the process I aspire to go through with the Arinoah Garden’s guests.
Therefore, in the table below, I explore the stages of the ARINOAH Coaching model referring to people actually coming to the Arinoah Garden. However, this model describes my current coaching practice, as it can be very well applied in any coaching process/session conducted without (or better: before J) the coachee actually travels to the Arinoah Garden personally.
III. Final words
“Coincidently” (again J), the 7 letters of the word “ARINOAH” correspond to the seven chakras, starting from the first chakra connected with grounding and ending with the seventh one, connected with higher awareness. Therefore, the colors of the letters reflect the colors of the corresponding chakras. This connection with the chakras system will not be explored in this document, however, depending on the coachee´s openness to this kind of theory, it can enrich all the stages of the presented model.
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Letter: |
Stands for: |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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“I AM HOME. I HAVE ARRIVED.” Thich Nhat Hanh |
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A |
Arrival |
Both physically to the Arinoah Garden, but also one’s self. At this stage, all kinds of grounding exercises, depending on the type of person they are and the timeframe of the coaching process (their stay in the Arinoah Garden), can be applied. |
a) Creating a welcoming atmosphere. b) Supporting them with grounding – assessing what kind of grounding practice would resonate with them the most. |
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Analytical analysis |
At this initial stage, people are usually analytical about their life. Still in their analytical left side of the brain, logical arguments, and focused on the superficial view on their outside circumstances. A Coachee is sharing what is happening in their life on the surface level: what seems to be there: “issues”, “challenges”, “struggles”, main “topics”. |
a) Creating a non-judgmental space and relationship. b) Inviting less story and more information about them as a person. c) Listen for the keywords, perspectives, cognitive errors, limiting beliefs, fear,s, and inner saboteurs. |
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Attitude revealing |
When revealing their stories, the Coachee shows their attitude towards themselves, life, others. |
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Agreement |
In some cases,s this might already be the time to establish the coaching agreement. Once the Coachee is more grounded and described their initial idea of what is on their mind, they start to be closer to be able to define, what they would like to achieve by the end of the coaching session/processes / their stay in the Arinoah Garden. |
a) Establishing the desired outcome. b) Exploring its importance. c) Discovering what needs to be addressed too to achieve it. d) Defining some success measures. |
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Letter |
Stands for |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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THE FOLLOWING STAGE IS PREPARING THEM TO BE ABLE (only at the later stage!) TO ANSWER IN SOME WAY THE CRUCIAL FOR ME QUESTIONS, WE SHOULD BE ASKING OURSELVES WHEN FACING ANY LIFE CHALLENGES (ROOTED IN MANY LIFE PHILOSOPHIES AND PSYCHOLOGICAL THEORIES, THUS PROPOSED IN DIFFERENT FORMS BY MANY TEACHERS AND AUTHORS):
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R |
Relax |
First, after traveling/grounding/sharing the surface reality, the Coacheecano release some tension and slow down – physically, mentally, and emotionally. This is crucial for the whole process –to prepare them for deeper work and accessing their deeper inner wisdom. |
a) Questions supporting their connection with their inner self –to activate their inner knowledge, their intuition, their sage. b) Exploring signals from their body and their emotions. |
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Reactions |
Strong emotions might come up as a response to the analytical analysis, some awareness that can come up at the beginning and/or as a consequence of finally: allowing themselves to relax, disconnect from the daily reality, reflect, and take time to look at their life. |
a) Holding a safe space for them. b) Accompanying empathically, normalizing their feelings, without attachment (practicing compassionate detachment). |
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Reflection |
Some deeper reflection should arise at this stage, after slowing down and initial exploration of their current life situation. |
a) Identifying important shifts (energy, emotions). b) Identifying potential areas of perspective’ change. |
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Retrospection |
At this stage, the Coachee might come up with some retrospective thoughts about the causes of their current state or life situation. |
a) Supporting them in exploring what issues/mechanisms they developed (rather than staying in the past). b) Exploring what needs to be addressed now to remove their obstacles, underlying limiting beliefs,s, and/or saboteurs developed as a result of their past experiences. |
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Realizations |
In many cases, the above brings some new awareness. |
a) Building on those “aha” moments – how can they be used to change their perspective or move forward. |
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Reality |
Many times, the above brings also some new – often more objective and constructive – perspective on their outside reality than the initial one. |
a) Exploring what such new perspective changes for them. b) Supporting them in using those new learnings in creating their way out/forward. |
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Letter |
Stands for |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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“ACTION WITHOUT A VISION IS A CHAOS. VISION WITHOUT AN ACTION IS A FANTASY” (Michael Bernard Beckwith) |
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I |
Introspection |
At this stage the Coachee might need to reflect on themselves, their behaviors, their reactions, and their emotional mechanisms. |
a) Holding a non-judgmental space for them. b) Support them in accepting what they discover about themselves. |
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Insights |
Some more thoughtful and more profound views about their situation arise. |
a) Supporting them in seeing how their old perspective could have sabotaged them. b) Supporting them in starting to look for ways to use those new insights in moving forward. |
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Intuition |
Ideally, their deeper inner knowledge is activated by this time. |
a) Identifying whether they do trust or rather tend to silence their inner voice. b) In the latter case, support them in realizing what it is costing them to do that. c) Inviting them in reach for what their intuition is telling them. |
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Inspiration |
Some Coachees get very inspired at this stage and are ready to move into action planning and organically move to create it. |
a) Identifying a good moment to actually support them in starting to create an action plan. |
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Intent |
For some Coachees, it is a good stage to actually see the ultimate goal – i.e. where they actually want to get with the outcome they set up at the beginning. |
a) Supporting them in the creation of a greater vision for themselves than they might have been able to see at the beginning (eg. through visioning exercises and inviting them to be bold with their greater vision for themselves). |
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Letter |
Stands for |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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“<IMPOSSIBLE> IS NOT A FACT. IT IS AN OPINION.” |
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N |
New perspective |
At this stage, all those appear. |
a) Moving the Coachee towards creating their first steps/action plans. b) Supporting them increating/realizing the need for some structures that they might need on the way. c) Challenging their ideas – how would those address the issues they raised at the beginning and get them towards the desired outcome. |
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New doors |
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New ways |
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New ideas |
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New dreams |
Sometimes, some completely new/revolutionary/hidden ideas come up at this stage. |
a) Supporting them in keeping the momentum. b) Supporting them in building on those new dreams. c) Identifying what it means to them to have those new dreams – what does it change for them or what needs to change in their life as a result. |
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New feelings |
Again, such deep and even bold new ideas might bring many strong new feelings. |
a) Exploring those feeling to support them in understanding where are those feelings coming from and defining what is it that they actually need and want to do with them. |
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Letter |
Stands for |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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THE FOLLOWING STAGE IS A GOOD MOMENT TO ASK THOSE OF MY FAVOURITE QUESTIONS:
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O |
Opening doors |
Some coachees are ready to explore how to open those new doors/areas/perspectives and dreams discovered above. |
a) Exploring options, their costs/consequences, and how realistic they are. |
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Openness |
At this stage, many coachees have much more self-awareness and are ready to openly say loud what is it that they truly want/area, if they were hiding something or shying away from it until now. |
a) Exploring what they are learning about themselves, their perspectives, their situation. b) Important – maintaining the non-judgmental space! |
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Outcome |
The actual desired outcome feels closer to them. Sometimes it gets clearer or even changes slightly. In some cases,s it changes entirely. |
a) Connecting them with the initial agreement/desired outcome and check how they feel about what they wanted to achieve. |
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Objectives |
Once their desired outcome is reconfirmed (or redefined), it is the latest time to move towards designing concrete actions to be taken. |
a) Supporting them in creating actions that would actually be working for them. b) Exploring supporting structures that they do have or need to create. |
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Letter: |
Stands for: |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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“A DAY IS A STEP. A YEAR IS A TANGO. EVERY YEAR COUNTS!” |
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AA |
Anchoring |
It is crucial to not forget that the more profound and new are their thoughts, the riskier it is that the learning will be “lost” when they come back to the day-to-day reality (after the session or even more, once they leave the Arinoah Garden). |
a) Supporting them in digging deeper, by exploring where in their life the discovered perspectives/mechanisms show up. b) Inviting them to think in what areas of their life they could apply all that they are realizing about themselves. What changes they want to introduce. |
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Accountability |
Obviously, for coaching to be actually effective for most of the coachees some kind of accountability structure is useful, if not necessary. |
a) Explore how they would want to hold themselves accountable. b) Explore what resources they have / could obtain to hold them accountable. c) Propose being their accountability partner. Acknowledgment |
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t |
Some people do have the skills and habit to reflect on their process and acknowledge themselves naturally. In such cases, it usually occurs at this stage. However, some do’s not. |
a) Noticing their ability (or lack of it) to acknowledge themselves and whether they did it in this particular process. b) Encourage them to acknowledge themselves for their progress and work in this process, if they have not done it organically themselves. c) Acknowledging their deep work and the effort to start the process (including traveling to Arinoah Garden, if that is the case) and to go through it. |
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Actions |
Some people might organically create actions to be implemented “as soon as they are back from Arinoah Garden/ out of the session”. Others might need support in creating actual action plans. |
a) In the first case, supporting them in creating structures (short term and long term) around their actions, accountability systems. b) For the latter group, support them in creating ideas on how to move forward. c) Empower them to feel the strength to implement changes. |
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Aspirations |
Also, some broader aspirations than the initial goal might appear towards the end. |
a) Explore how would it feel to them / what would be possible for them when they achieve those new aspirations. b) Support them in growing those new broader aspirations for them to not dissolve. |
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Anxiety |
It happens also that all those new insights/aspirations/actions and even the sole idea of getting closer to the realization of their long chased dreams might trigger some fears or some difficult reactions. |
a) Support them in exploring those. b) Support them in deciding what do they want to do with this anxiety and/or the thoughts that caused it. c) Connecting back to the initial goal – whether this anxiety brings any new thoughts about what they actually want. |
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Awareness |
Again, a lot of new awareness might happen here as a result of those unexpected strong emotions. |
a) Support them in exploring it and deciding what do they want to do with it. b) Explore how this new awareness could apply in other areas of their life. |
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Acceptance |
Eventually comes the acceptance of their feelings, new perspective, or also of the current situation they are in (having a new perspective on it)<p><strong>A Coaching Model Created by Patrycja Sałacińska-Kone</strong><br /> |
a) Acknowledging them for the process and sage response to it. b) Connecting back to the initial goal – whether this anxiety brings any new thoughts about what they actually want. |
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Anew |
They are ready to start/approach their challenges in a new way. |
a) Acknowledging them for the process. b) Exploring whether they feel that maybe something is still missing for them to be able to deal with their challenge of starting anew. |
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Letter |
Stands for |
What happens with the Coachee (the Arinoah Garden’ guest): |
What does it require from me as a Coach (the Arinoah Garden’ Host): |
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THIS LAST STAGE, JUST AS THE LETTER “H” IN THE WORD “ARINOAH” IS KIND OF SILENT…NOT EASY TO GRASP WITH THE CONSCIOUS AND ANALYTICAL MIND…SO IS THE WISDOM OF THE SEVENTH CROWN CHAKRA… IT MIGHT NOT HAPPEN / BE OBVIOUS BY THE END OF OUR COACHING JOURNEY / SESSION / FIRST STAY IN THE ARINOAH GARDEN, BUT HOPEFULLY THE WHOLE PROCESS WE WENT THROUGH PLANTED A SEED FOR THE FOLLOWING STAGE TO MANIFEST IN THEIR LIFE: “HEAVEN IS NOT A PLACE WHERE WE GO WHEN WE DIE. IT IS A STATE OF MIND.” (Michael Bernard Beckwith) |
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H |
Harvesting |
Refers to harvesting the entire process and enjoying the resulting state. If in the Arinoah Garden, enjoying the rest of their stay in this beautiful place. |
a) Possibly supporting them in realizing what they learned about themselves. b) How can they use this learning in other areas of their lives? c) Acknowledging them for the whole process. |
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Higher awareness |
For some people, some higher awareness might arise. |
a) Support them in this process. b) Support them in creating some structures to maintain and apply this awareness in their life. |
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Home |
Finally, the Coachee comes back “home” – physically (i.e. from the Arinoah Garden or the session to their everyday life), but also, ideally, to their “home” in a more metaphorical sense. My aspiration is for them to touch the state of “I am home. I have arrived.” that the great teacher Thich Nhat Hanh is describing. |
a) Assuring them that I am (and the Arinoah Garden is) there for them, whenever they need it in the future. b) Recommending some readings, if they express their interest in deepening their process. |
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Happiness |
My ultimate aspiration is to walk with them this whole path to get them closer to their happiness and the realization that “happiness is a state of mind” that does not need to depend on the outside circumstances, achievements, and whatever life is throwing at them. |
a) Celebrating with them any step they made towards this awareness and supporting them in finding the ways to celebrate this great achievement. |
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Harmony |
That is for me another ultimate goal of any coaching process, and thus my highest aspiration for my Coachees and all Arinoah Garden guests. |
a) Providing them with some tools, exercises, and ideas about balancing, ground in,g, and emotional balance in their life forward to maintain and continue their process. |
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[1]Living in Spain, I feel so fortunate to be able to experience the beauty of this country and the essence of this culture’s way of being, and the influence that those have on people’s entire wellbeing. It strikes me particularly, coming from a very different culture and having also experienced some other cultures too – where suffering seems to be intrinsically embodied in the everyday existence and feels almost inevitable daily. In all those moments, I have an enormous wish to share at least a glance of it, a moment of it, a few days of it, with all those people that I have met and will meet in my life journey and who suffer almost daily and so firmly believe that this is how their life is supposed to look like forever.
From this need, the idea of buying a plot of land with some devastating buildings and abandoned, yet already beautiful, gardens arose. To create a place where I will be able to freely invite all of them and support their healing and life journey, using my coaching skills.